Trump. The ultimate troll. He trolls everyone. But, right now I’m obviously his favorite target.
Yesterday he worked at McDonald’s for fifteen minutes so he could say he worked at McDonald’s fifteen minutes longer than me.
The owner of the McDonald’s franchise, Derek Giacomantonio, said in a statement that the event was held to allow the former President to “observe the transformative working experience that 1 in 8 Americans have had: a job at McDonald’s.”
One in 8, but not me. F no. But there is no way to check, so it’s been part of my “made up history” to make me seem relatable.
And my staff? They laughed. “It hit kinda close to home,” they said. “And reminded people that you lie, a lot.”
They went further to say it was brilliant, heartwarming, and actually his best troll yet.
“Wtf!” I yelled.
Don’t worry, they said. The media will spin it into something great for you. And our surrogates will make up some more lies about him. Just go out with your slick hair and pretend you’re a caring, smart, talented leader. Keep up the act; you’re going to win an Oscar!
15 days to go.
We good?