Month: November 2020

Looks like we are gonna pull this off. Bad orange man bad was a great running platform. The media on my side … it was brilliant. Russia Russia Russia and Impeach Impeach Impeach gave us a big lead in the house in 2018. The media is great at driving home a point – any point – even if it’s not true.

We are still working to steal the senate. I think it’s likely we can still pull that off. Few more ballots here and there.

Close electoral college situation. Up 19k votes in Arizona with 10 percent of the votes not counted. Up 10k votes in Georgia. Let’s than a 1 percent victory in many states. Some states headed to recounts. And Nevada using sloths to count their votes seems strange.

Anyway, the media called the victor. I’ll heal the nation. Need to nap first.

Come on, man.

Looks like it comes down to Nevada.

Oh, sure. We could probably dig up another million votes in a Pennsylvania. Or some other states. But, to minimize the chatter about “cheating” it would help to just win Nevada. I’m up, even though the rural vote still needs to come in and those yee haws like Trump.

Capitalism is killing us. A state that thrives on greed, avarice, and tit bars is going to be the difference in the election. At least that’s what they are telling me. Come on Silver State. I can’t believe I’m going to be the Senator of the US!

Pennsylvania found a way to minimize votes for Trump. Just don’t let anyone watch the vote counting. No observers. Big trash cans marked with “place valid Trump votes here for counting”. Great job PA!

Come on, Nevada. How long does it take to count votes anyway. China wants an answer on who will be President. Don’t let them down.

Come on, man.

My staff talks a lot in front of me like I’m not in the room. Or, as if I’m not listening or don’t matter or would have nothing to add to the conversation.

“You know I’m right here, right!?”

That’s what I want to say. But, in all fairness, I’m usually not paying attention, may be napping, or I really have nothing to add.

Today, they were talking nervously and loudly. The polls show us ahead everywhere. But, it just doesn’t feel like I’m ahead out in the real world to them, I guess.

Some of their random thoughts today…. There are more people in line for the bathroom at a Trump event than the number of people that bother to come out to see us… Joe just keeps yelling. And sometimes incoherently….More Trump supporters are showing up at Biden rallies than Biden supporters…. Most of the swing states are within the margin or error…. Florida is not looking good for Biden…. Who’s dumb idea was it to send Kamala to Texas?…. Obama doesn’t look great on the attack – what happened to “when they go low, we go high.”…..I want to strangle Hunter…. I’m going to have some serious soul searching to do when this shit show comes to an end….When we are in office, first thing we should do is ban horns. This shit sucks.

I listened a little. But, the polls have me winning. I am already planning my inauguration speech. Where I say…. well, let’s figure that out later. Something about shutting down, be patriotic and starve in your homes…?

Come on, man.